My Friday morning started off really freaky. On top of my pain, the fact that two different pharmacists can't or won't fill my prescriptions, and I'd lost my Zanex (the few I have left), I ended up losing my glasses. I'm in a car with 5 other members of my family having a panic attack and trying to maintain a cool composure. I'm screaming inside of my mind hoping I don't throw up. I immediatly went into one of my MS support groups and said "Sorry...gotta vent or I will burst out in tears. I don't want to talk to anyone but I have to because I have to get my 18yr old enrolled into college. I feel lightheaded. Ugh".
Immediately support came and my online friends helped me calm down. My husband also told me to just relax. I have a really great support system most times. I'm blessed that way. And my glasses were in the car near my foot. Ain't GOD GOOD?!
Misplacing things are a common occurrence in the MS Community. "White matter is the brain region underlying the gray matter cortex, composed of neuronal fibers coated with electrical insulation called myelin. Previously of interest in demyelinating diseases such as multiple sclerosis, myelin is attracting new interest as an unexpected contributor to a wide range of psychiatric disorders, including depression and schizophrenia.
This is stimulating into myelin involvement in normal cognitive function, learning and IQ. Myelination continues for decades in the human brain; it is modifiable by experience, and it affects information processing by regulating the velocity and synchrony of impulse conduction between distant cortical regions. Cell-culture molecular mechanisms regulating myelination by electrical activity, and myelin also limits the critical period for learning through inhibitory proteins that suppress axon sprouting and synaptogenesis." Is what I read in a wonderful article called White matter in learning, cognition and psychiatric disorders
By R. Douglas Fields. Great article , and you can read the rest here http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2486416/ .
It only goes to show that by MS being a demyelinating disease I'm pretty much like this until we find a cure. I mean, how in the world do you get to the point where you are demyelinating? Who does that? Us Ms'ers I suppose.
My husband's brother and cousin are in town. I'm socially awkward and I freak out in crowds, but I sure hope I can hang out with them. After everything was said and done, I got home and looked for my meds and found them! I tried anither pharmacy and they filled my pain prescription. I still dont have my new anxiety meds or my headache meds. Something is better than nothing unless the something is bad, but right now i'm so happy.
But still, I'm fully aware of my age and my limitations. I'm 42 so I'm still young. But I'm disabled with MS and in a slight relapse. As my husband pointed out today, "We're disabled". I'm going to be realistic, though. If I can't go out, I won't. But if I do, I have my my missing meds.