Monday, September 30, 2013

MS Right right now

We have a plan. We always have had this plan, even.before we met. I love him; Rafe (my husband, my twin soul, my Adam, my King). Last night when I was feeling helpless when having an MS episode and panic attack, he was there for me even though it scared him so much. We have only been married one year, and most of the time I was healthy so this part is new to him. I do thank GOD for him, though.

MS has changed my quality of life for now. I say "for now" because. No more amusement park rides, no.long car trips without me having to ask whoever to pull off at the next exit for constant restroom breaks when my bladder is acting up. No outdoor activities in the too warm or too cool weather. Intense pain from time to time that hits me so hard. Its a lot. Unimaginable chronic pain. Etc etc etc ( too many things to list)

Rafe is twelve years younger than I am, so I decided to do what my mom did ( to an extent).  I'm his wife and I doubt he'll find another, but I am also royalty; the empress queen of our family. And I will  find my king another queen (but I want to know her and help them in all ways and be sister/queen to her and co-mom to their children while I'm still alive). And everyone knows I.would adore a queen! So it works out perfectly for us lol)

Before my mom died of cancer she asked me to find the right woman for her husband. She lived him so broke her heart to know that she would be parting from him and not being able to protect him, as a wife does....and so I did as she asjed and put my matchmaking (and praying) skills to use. SUCCESS STORY TO BE TOLD AT A LATER DATE BUT LONG STORY SHORT. He is so happy with his second wife and his second wife is awesome and taking care of him wonderfully. She even embraces my children and I, which was part of the package; everything my mom hoped for him. She's my mother's co-wife even though they never officially met. My mother really loved him and I know in my.heart of.hearts my mother, from where she rests in peace, loves Mum, too. .

ONLY GOD CAN JUDGE US AND ONLY GOD CAN BLESS SPIRITUAL UNIONS The future makes me so....anxious at times but my faith pulls me through. My children pull me through. My husband pulls me through. GOD pulls me through. I don't want to miss a moment of my life. "I have MS, it does not have me", is what I constantly remind myself. I have so much more to do, a family to raise and a husband to care for and going hard to fight this #MSMonster.

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