I'm Considering going postal

Please don't be alarmed, but I'm considering going postal. Let me tell you why.

It all started (this time) on last Tuesday. Mika the driver picked us up to take us to my neuro. I didn't have an appointment only needed to pick up my prescriptions. Most of my prescriptions can be called but Norco and the new headache medicine are considered to be "controlled substances".

Mika The Driver then took us to Walgreens to fill the scripts. After a few moments the pharmacist said that they were not in stock of my prescriptions and to try CVS. I've been through this before at this location, so I went to a different Walgreens, only to be told the same thing.

I went back home because Mika had another fare, prescriptions in hand unfillable. I was sad and frustrated but I had a few pills left from the previous month.

On Friday I went to the Kroger near my husband's old job. They were able to fill the Norco, so I filled it there. I was frustrated that the others couldn't be filled, but 1 out of 4 was better than nothing. Then we went to a Publix and they said they couldn't fill the prescriptions and the pharmacist suggested that I ask my doctor to order me a lesser prescription of Zanex (1 mg instead of 2) with more pills per dose. Or to try CVS. That's stupid. Whatever, I leave.

Today is Saturday. We went grocery shopping at Kroger. The pharmacist there filled my Restoril and gave me a weeks worth of my Zanex and said I could pick up the remainder on Tuesday, which is fine by me. The suggested CVS for my new headache medicine Bupap Tussi Caps (Dexpac) . I thanked them and will go back Tuesday.

When I first got diagnosed with MS, I used CVS. I only switched to Walgreens because they are open 24/7. But what good is that if I can't even fill my meds there. For this doctors visit alone I've been to pharmacy's in Walgreens, Publix, and Kroger with plans of going to CVS whenever I can get another ride. Mika charges at least $15 or more per trip to take me on my errands. Being on a fixed income, extra running around costs me a lot. This is one of the unfortunate issues that I face as a disabled American. I pray for safe access so I don't have to run around so much for "controlled substances".

I feel paranoid about how they act when I bring in what they consider "controlled substances". I am considering my insurance's mail order program. I'm Considering going postal and just having them mail me my prescriptions because I'm tired of rejection or prejudice. I'm tired of the pharmacist tech asking me for my identification prior to telling me my meds aren't available. It's like a set-up. That makes me more paranoid; the unknown on what could possibly be on the computer screen in front of them. Sometimes it seems like they don't tell me my prescriptions aren't available until after they look at my ID. I feel like I'm on a " controlled substance" list. I have chronic pain, mood swings, insomnia, and massive head pain. And I have an incurable disease. I would like nothing more than to control the substances that I medicate with, but I can't unless I choose not to medicate with pharmsudicals and just suffer through my symptoms instead, which I mostly do. Georgia is where I was born and raised, but Georgia needs to be compassionate and allow patients to have safe access and to support homegrown. No patient should have to go to that many pharmacy's and still not have everything prescribed. Just venting. With a headache.

Name your poison and Sneak Peek of Video 2

Risperdal, Zanex, Norco, Temazepam, Mirtazapine, and Amitripyline. Name your poison, those are mine. Throw in a possibility of Gabapentin and Tudorza Pressair (fancy, right???) and we've pretty much darn near got the contents of my bag down to a T.

I take these poisoned prescribed pharmsudicals that are prescribed to me every day in order to feel some level of normal and to treat my symptoms that are caused by having my disabilities, not by preference. I still do not understand how something toxic is supposed to help, but I pray.

While cleaning out my medicine bag, I saw some meds that were expired.  At first thought, I was going to flush them but then I thought about the toxins in the pills going into the tap (tainted and polluted) water and making people and animals sickER.  So then I thought to crush them into powder and set them on fire, but then I thought a out air pollution with toxic gas.  I couldn't bury it because then I'd put toxins in the soil. I was about to go on a whirlwind in my mind but finally my husband looked up how to discard expired prescription meds and it said there is a service that comes by to pick them up    http://www.disposemymeds.org/  .  How do I know that they are not just recycling old pills back to patients and that's why they don't always work.  I don't know.  I'm paranoid about what goes into pills and such as opposed to what is naturally grown or provided by mother nature. Anything that's not natural is un-natural.   That's common sense even to someone like me with cognitive issues. 

As of right now I'm down to 5-7 pill prescriptions in my everyday carry bag, (1 of which I take daily if I have to be around other people) and 4 of which I take most days and nights ( 1 of which is to allow my mind to stop raving long enough to go to sleep).  With the physical part of the disability so eratic, the emotional and mental can take its toll on anyone, especially the MS patient like me.  There's no wonder why I'm seeing a chiropractor with all the medications I have in my bag...that bag is heavy and my spine is  curved all kind of ways.  I have scoliosis and also bone spurs.  Getting these things spine adjustments can help in making my MS better and give me almost 14 more years of life..and those visits will cost me upwards of  $2500 with insurance .  But they work!  https://youtu.be/3QzCKReW0Iw  I'm hoping to be able to get the treatments I need that are not involving pills.  I've got to raise some money so that the little treatments I can do without pharmaceuticals.  That's all I want; to live a life without pharmaceuticals and pain and everything else 

I long for a place where there is safe access to what GOD intended for us, natural herbs and plants galore.  And though I'm not there yet, I also give thanks that I'm able to homeschool my princess
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